“there will be free drinks and music and the normal first friday crap.”
Philadelphia Legend and FunVampires Tyrant, Hans Pecans, rocks this upcoming first Friday at Reward.  Don’t sleep on this one, chumps!

In case you didn’t read the newzzz today [post, ht], America is at new highs in both our prison population and the percentage of our population in prison. We’ve smashed our records. We’re the worldwide champs. Most overall people in jail - 2, 300, 000! What’s up now, China? 1/99 Americans in jail! […]

The fitness craze is just getting out of control if you ask me. Even our barnyard pals the cows have gotten on the band wagon. In this National Geographic video clip we have an interesting case of science and good old fashioned animal husbandry creating essentially the bovine version of a Pumping Iron […]

Hilarious and sad times we live in… T-Mob, aka T-Mobile, aka Deutsche Telekom apparently claim trademark ownership of the color magenta. I understand the whole pantone color trademark thing ie: Tiffany blue but, how anyone could own a fucking process color is beyond me. From this day forward i claim cyan to be the official […]

Well it’s that time of year again and today is the day where you’r supposed to pretend that voting matters, isn’t a complete scam and somehow helps people (other than the pockets of the candidate) or the world. But alas we all know it doesn’t. So stop fooling yourself and clinging onto a crude false […]

Soon after September 11th, the State Department “Council of American Muslims for Understanding… and the American People” created a “Shared Values” series of public relations videos in order to improve our image in Middle Eastern nations. These videos contain heartwarming stories of Muslims in America but leave out the not-so-heartwarming stories of Americans in Oil […]

You heard it here first. That’s what our secret sources say at FV (foxtrot victor) Cuba Base Camp. We’ll get back to you with any proof. Not that you’ll need it if/when CNN is all over this shit. Either way, rumors are fun. We scooped the world. p.s. RIP Miami!

Ever since i heard the term “Pro-ana” (pro-anorexia) i’ve been amazed at how huge and open their, for lack of a better term, movement is. The BBC is doing a report on how these groups are thriving on internet social networking sites like myspace and facebook.  “Dr John Morgan, a consultant psychiatrist St George’s University […]

Via Yahoo: “BANGKOK, Thailand - Thai police officers who break rules will be forced to wear hot pink armbands featuring “Hello Kitty,” the Japanese icon of cute, as a mark of shame, a senior officer said Monday….. “Simple warnings no longer work. This new twist is expected to make them feel guilt and shame and […]

So I’ve been searching the web for awhile now for footage of Straight Edge in the news media. I’m specifically looking for the 48 Hours and 20/20 reports from the mid 90’s and the local Philly news affiliate coverage (I remember they were in the now long gone C.I. Records store off
South Street) that […]

Believe it or not this is a true fucking story! The former Soviet pinko commie Union has planted their flag on the sea floor at the north pole. They’re making a land grab because they want the dead dinosaur goop that most likely is chilling (har har) down there and just waiting to be turned […]

The war pigs Bush administration has recently announced a genious plan to sell billions and billions and billions of dollars worth of weapons to our good friends in the Middle East: Israel (but definitely NOT Palestine), the royal family of Saudi Arabia, Egypt, Kuwait, the United Arab Emirates, Qatar, Bahrain and Oman. Apparently, these countries […]

It seems that the crazy/beautiful, talented and vegan (ie. perfect for me) Fiona Apple likes her dudes old and dirty like Jonathan Ames. Keep going for a hot make-out picture and a link to the full story and some videos and bullshit…

This should really be pissing people off but no one even cares. The United States Army is putting it’s FPS game “America’s Army” in arcades around the country to recruit your children grown men to fight for the rich white guys in charge. Because you know war is just a game and no one ever […]

OK i lied. My main man Dennis Kucinich is putting his interns up for adoption to help fund his fledgling campaign. Even though the man is the sanest person on the Democratic ticket with the best ideas he is also the man with the non-white-soundingest name, has a peace symbol in his logo and is […]

Here at the FV Cult Compound we love us some candy. Today we were stoked to see this new little camo coated kiss by Hershey. It’s pretty weird though really and i have conflicting feelings about it (USA USA USA). The kisses themselves are wrapped in an almost traditional woodland camo foil as seen above. […]

Fuck the 4th of July. This is Independence Day. Live free, America!
Click on for a list of my favorite Americans and a stupid contest!

In a landmark decision, the Supreme fucking Court decided that a high school student has NO RIGHT to publically display a “Bong Hits for Jesus” banner. Apparently, the implicit advocation of smoking weed is sooooo terrible that it overrides any concerns about Freedom of Speech or Freedom of Religion.
Keep going for a related story containing […]

Crust Punx responsible for yesterday’s rooftop murder?

According to abc 6 good ole, never hurt anyone west philly crusties may be responisble for yesterdays rooftop murder. We have one question, where was Tony Pointless on Sunday night? We will try to update later when our crusty correspondent wakes up.

Again our main man Ed has hooked us up via email with bunch of links (which is good because someone has been slacking). Among them was this gem which is right up the FV alley. Replate.org is a place, nay a movement that is very simple. Don’t waste your food homies. Got some leftovers? Put […]